There are downsides to being a single mom, no question. However, there are also plenty of great things about it too, and some of us are perhaps even better suited to single parenting. Almost half of all new moms last year were single. Where they are, I do not know because most of the people I know with children have spouses or live in mates. Sometimes I wish I had a mate, but most of the time I don't. Most of the time I'm grateful I don't. Men are awesome creatures, nothing against them, I just like the lighter stress load. Our small families are as much of a family as larger more traditional families with two parents. Let's celebrate our single motherhood and count some blessings.
2. You don't have to take care of another person. Sometimes having a mate in the house is like having another child (so I'm told). It can represent more work, not less, more stress not less, etc.
3. Spontaneity is more spontaneous. We do what we want when we want. If we want to get up and make cupcakes at midnight, we do! And we have. Charlie and Lola marathons, pizza in bed, sitting on the porch watching the moon way past bedtime... all those things, I suspect, would be more difficult or just wouldn't happen with a spouse in the house.
4. No in-laws. In-laws can be great, I know this from past relationships and have wanted to marry specifically to get those wonderful in-laws. But they can also make your life a living hell, which I know from married friends. And I think the latter happens to be the more common scenario.
5. Closer bond with child. For me, putting all my energy and focus into my relationship with my son leads to a deep intimacy and tight bond. I suspect if I had to put focus on another person, this bond couldn't be quite as close.
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